Unexpected Guests!

Unexpected Guests

You walk into your home to find a couple you don’t know sitting in your living room, eating a slice of cake. Tell us what happens next.

 

Nietzsche says, there are no facts only interpretations. Actually, there is no objective universe out there. All universes are subjective universes, so you are constantly talking about your interpretations and you think that by getting many people to agree with you, you start talking about facts, but it’s never so. I neither read fiction, nor write it. I don’t think I write facts either. My interpretation of life events–the egoic cobwebs-do they qualify as facts or fiction or neither? I don’t know.

The prompt today immediately spoke to me. Not even a split second was needed to accept or reject it as a scene from an evening 3 years ago started playing in my mind. I went to attend an examination and as I returned and walked inside home – in the living room an elderly couple was sitting- eating a slice of cake. As soon as they saw me they stood up from their seats and both of them tried to touch my feet. I got startled at such respect and held their hands in air saying that there was no need to pay obeisance to me. I didn’t think that I deserved that. Then, my grandma who was sitting there with them told with a smile on her face that they were parents of a girl who was supposed to be my bride if I accepted the proposal. This annoyed me a great deal as I had become fed-up with all marriage proposals, especially this one in particular. The talk had been going on and on for many months.

 

Wreckage wrecked by mystic fire had made me bed-ridden and almost handicapped my motor functions altogether-leaving me at the mercy of psych-meds and my vehement and overweening father who kept entertaining buyers despite my resistance. Women are burdens in most indian families in developing cities and women empowerment is just a talk in thin air. Parents of a girl are supposed to butter and flatter all relatives of boy and pay huge sums as dowry in order to get her married. No wonder the couple was willing to touch my feet(which is a custom amongst Hindus to show respect to elders and those who are of ‘higher rank’ among relatives and in social circles.)

I kept resisting against their proposal which kept striking every few months. My grandma said they were well-to-do and girl would have brought a lot of dowry had I married. Ah! I ran away in time and the girl got married to another guy. Now she is a happy mother. When she first spoke to me on Facebook earlier this year, she jokingly said that I became a Baba(a renunciate) because I couldn’t marry her! I laughed and asked her why she had flunked the class seventh in school. She said she used to be a lazy girl then. Now she has a good job, a good family and she is a mother.

image courtesy: here

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15 thoughts on “Unexpected Guests!

        1. Yes yes. Though I have been following my destiny as I surrendered and I don’t do an extra effort to accomplish anything, so chances of that happening have become slimmer day by day. It’s not that I wish it to be one way or the other…I feel the investment in maintaining close personal relations is so much that I can’t afford it with the awareness of all the horrors around me. Romantic love is beautiful and most intense but I can commit myself either to freedom and service or to getting frustrated by romance which is not on the cards 🙂 🙂

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  1. The parents of the girl must be so much older than you yet they touched your feet? Isnt it against Hindu customs for elders to touch youngsters feet? Wow, this is sad if they did that with the hopes of convincing you to marry their daughter.
    I dont mean any disrespect to you, but I just feel so bad about the whole ‘girls are a burden because of dowry’ concept!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You can’t mean any disrespect but what I say is a harsh reality. If you come and visit here I can show you ‘business-deals’ and ‘negotiations’ before and after marriages and how much is invested and what ado they create.

      As for touching feet: that is true. I never let anyone touch my feet but some people insist too much and I respect their feelings too but other than that Hindu customs are also there in place which make it customary for maternal uncle to touch your feet. Some sections make it compulsory to touch feet of girl children no matter how young they are.

      Almost all family members of girl’s side touch feet of all members of boy side and boy is god incarnate for a while(at least in terms of rituals) after a while it remains rituals only and maybe not even rituals depending on how mighty he proves to be. It’s all a big drama to witness lol 😀 After every 15 kilometers you see different customs. They don’t pain me as they are fun but wherever harsh discrimination based on sex, color or caste is involved I feel hurt and repelled 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. That doesn’t sound pleasant! No matter what, elders shouldn’t be touching feet! The notion of a girl being a burden will go down but change is a slow process. And we can be certain that in a few years it will change because you and I are already demoting it. So will our children. We have to be the path for change. Glad you put this incident into light.

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    1. Yes, the play of memory is what I put and I didn’t intend it to be another “women empowerment” post. But I stated what I felt was needed and i completely agree with you.

      What I don’t agree with is: no matter what elders shouldn’t be touching feet. This I don’t agree with but my stance would need explaining as well as the similar background on the side of the reader. There have been many realized masters and if an old man shows respect to a Buddha who is a young man–it is respect to life and to self. Of course, a self-realized master may or may not allow others to touch his or her feet depending on his personality and the need of the hour but it is certainly possible that a 80 year man touches feet of a 15 year old. By elders I mean all elders.

      Society is changing for better and a time will come when balance will be gained. Then it will start to become a matriarchal society: for collective karma has to pay sweetly. 😀

      Thanks for your visit and thoughtful feedback, Suchi 🙂

      Love and light ❤

      Anand 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, that is the sad reality. It’s not that they mean all the respect they show. Well some people do, as they consider it some kind of Dharma, since boy’s family is on a higher platform by virtue if having a ‘male’ side. But most of the times, it’s buttering to get ‘deal’ done. The respect quotient starts dying down smoothly over the months after the marriage. I will read your poem soon, thanks for your visit and the discussion, Sonya 🙂

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