Note: Exaggerations and excessive use of images is to sell rather dull writing, but it’s not bought anyway as you are wiser by this time!
Never Participate In Writing Contests
What are you trying to get by participating in those horrible contests? What will you get by winning a NabloPablo or a Booker or Nobel prize? Will it make you feel like the greatest artist ever or give you much desired feeling of belonging to the great artist clubs which you have craved for since childhood? Don’t participate. They suck!
Deferment of Judgement
Never think twice while writing whether someone will like it or not. What will happen at max–someone will say ‘you suck!’ You suck anyway–so keep writing and never ever hesitate to speak your heart out provided it doesn’t hurt others much. A little bit is fine.! Sometimes that is needed! If you keep judging yourself you will always be in a vicious loop which stays on your skin like a parasite and you don’t know if loop is inside you or you are inside it–so chill and let words roll out–even if they sound ordinary!
Out of Great Quantity An Average Quality Emerges!
If you write a little and feel that it is the best you have done in your life–then you limit yourself. Someone appreciates you with great remarks–maybe you get a prize and make some money on it–you feel insecure about yourself–how are you going to repeat this? Ah, this again is a big problem! It was better to be anonymous–now everyone expects great things from you! Really? Nobody expects nothing from you–nobody is so free from themselves so as to expect anything from you–like everything else–limelight is also an illusion. People have small attention spans and even smaller memory spans–they forget sooner than you think they do. They have bazillions of problems to take care of. So if you want to suck at writing you should keep writing and don’t think that you can do so just by doing it once with all your might and then shouting out at the world ” I did it, now pay attention to me!”
Freenoting–Write At Stretch!
Keep writing whatever comes to your head. Let the bullies–inner and outer sleep. The boundaries between your subconscious and conscious start getting thinner only after a certain threshold has been reached. So, maybe you kept writing 2 hours at a stretch everyday–nothing happened. Now try writing 5 hours non-stop and you will get nightmares in night, voila! Thinning of boundaries has happened! The virginity of writer’s block is no more there!
Don’t Try To Be A Great Writer!
Who do you look upto? Virginia Woolf? Shakespeare? Wilde? Joyce? Well, that was all I had in my repertoire. I looked up to no one and I can preach only what I practice; so look upto none. Just think: When Shakespeare was not the mighty Shakespeare did he look up to anyone? Or was he trying to become the mighty bard? I am sure he never attended any writing classes or contests. He had never heard of NabloPablo or NanoRamo! Don’t try to be a great writer–be yourself. Enjoy what you do–stay average, stay peaceful!
Don’t Read, Reading Will Affect Your Writing!
If you are a voracious reader, they say, you are very likely to become a great writer or so did I understand. It’s better to be in your safe fearless corner of denying that there exists a world of fiction. Don’t read and if you do-write more than you read!
Logorrhea and Blabberwockying!
If you want to sound obnoxious and yet appear like a fool, start using long words and to impress others use exceedingly large sentences like Charles Dicken’s opening sentence in Great Expectations( Don’t worry, I didn’t read that book beyond that sentence!) If you want to sound like a great intellectual try using long words and long sentences together and throw-in some archaic, academic and scientific words right out of dictionaries( no need to read for that reading is painful!)
On the other hand if you want to sound humble and polite–use repetitive words like I did in this sentence. Use small sentences. Use small words. Pretend that you have a small attention span. Make it a rule to never use a sentence which has more than 20 words. You will rock!
As large font suggests an extravert and small an introvert–similarly using big paragraphs and big sentences suggests a literati. Using big words, big paragraphs and big sentences–all three means a super-literati so avoid them. If you can use smileys on blog posts like these 🙂 😛 😀 this would certify that you are cool!
In the end we all rock so don’t try to be a rocket!